Slicing together is like being in an online writers' group. I love getting inspiration from others' posts. Today, fellow Slicer and Blogger Fran McVeigh inspired me to write about a childhood memory.
Her technique, delving into her past, reminded me of an exersize Ralph Fletcher led during his keynote at last summer's Writing Insititue at the Teachers College Reading and Writing Project. He invited us to mentor ourselves using his poem, The Good Old Days.
Then, he asked us to copy only the first and last stanzas, and fill in the rest with our own memories. Here is what I wrote:
Sometimes I remember
The good old days
Running through the cornfields
The sharp leaves stinging our legs
Chasing the fireflies
As they twinkled a rhythm in the sky
Sucking the sweet drop of nectar
That came from the end of a flower
Curling up in a heap
Our bodies giving out much sooner than our plans
I still can't imagine
anything better than that.
Today, I am going to revisit this strategy. One mark of a good writing mentor is that you can return to it again and again, with fresh eyes, each time taking away something different.
Here is today's poem:
Road Trips
Sometimes I remember
The good old days
Drives across the country
With dad
Counting mile markers
And red cars
Hearing stories
Of days long ago in the city
Pit stops
In forgotten little towns
Eight hundred miles
Just us
To him,
being the most important person in the world
I still can't imagine
anything better than that.
Thanks for the shout out, Anna. I actually was reading blogs last night in search of the "just right" inspiration for today's slice. I knew when I was still chuckling and revising as I fell asleep that I was on the "right path" for the day! :-)
ReplyDeleteOh my....what a treasure. This poem captures so much in a few words. Magical....how old were you?
ReplyDeleteI was at a day long workshop with Ralph Fletcher a year and a half ago and he used the same poem and we did the same thing. I've done it since with my students and it has worked well. I love that you revisited it and wrote a different poem using the same mentor text. I also recall him saying, don't squeeze all of the juice out of a mentor text. Notice what elements students borrow... and there are many that can be borrowed from his poem, in addition to the beginning and ending lines.
ReplyDeleteI love Ralph Fletcher. I have done this with other poems too.....revisiting gives a whole new perspective.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully done, Anna. Ralph must use the idea more than once, because I've seen it too, but nevertheless, you did it well, & found the essence of your time with your dad!
ReplyDeleteOh, I remember that keynote, Anna - now you've reminded me to try this again - this time, with my kids. Your poem is rich and vivid - lovely to read and visualize.
ReplyDeleteOOH, I remember that lesson! I'm going to try it again tonight! Thanks for the memories, and the idea for my SOLSC post! By the way, Ralph Fletcher rocks, yes? Yes!
ReplyDeleteI love Ralph Fletcher's work. I have never seen this poem though, or this technique. Love it. Was trying to think of a post for Poetry Fridays, maybe I will try this!
ReplyDeleteI remember writing a poem like this under the influence of Ralph's work. It really helps produce such rich images.
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